Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday

3 weeks into the semester and I'm both loving and hating it. I never have a simple reaction to any one thing, & it's pretty annoying, I must admit. But school... Ah. I have such a love-hate relationship with school and studying, I don't even know where to begin! I absolutely abhor travelling to school on the 857-151 bus route in the mornings at 8.30am, detest waking up at 7.30 in the morning, do not like trudging to school for just that 1 or 2 hours - I like to pack my days so I get the most out of them. I am starting to panic over the amount of reading that's piling up: Pynchon is an absolute bitch to read, and I'm a bit worried (okay understatement there) about what I'm even gonna write for my 1st essay on that. Not too worried about utopia & dystopia, rather enjoying it, really. But the NM modules are posing a bit of a worry to me cos of the massive projects they involve. I'm never the best at project work. :(

Mondays are my most exhausting days cos I'm in school from 10am-8pm, then Tuesdays come close on the "tiring" scale with 10am-4pm back-to-back classes. Wednesdays and Thursdays are the what I hate the most cos I only have a lecture from 10am-12pm on Weds, and beat this: a 2pm-3pm tutorial slot on Thursday. WTF RIGHT.

Sigh I have to go start cooking the purely experimental olive fried rice for the potluck I was supposed to be at tonight. I didn't mean to just whine in this post today, but I have no time for anything else, but.

I am also very irritated with my computer's seemingly non-existent sound card. This has meant I have not watched Gossip Girl, Big Bang Theory, or ANTM since last November/December, nor have I listened to any songs from my iTunes. Majorly irritating, but I have to do something about that real soon. Before the really dumb 2nd Life tutorial I'm gonna have to attend in Feb for one of my NM modules. 

May 2010 be as beautiful as 2009 has been.

HAPPY 2010 TO ALL YOU LOVELY PEOPLE WHO'RE READING THIS RIGHT NOW! :)

Kinda belated, but it's never too late for well wishes, I've been told. :)
2009 was an eventful year in more ways than one, and I wouldn't have traded any of what my year was for anyone else's experience of 2009. I got to travel with Clem my love in the US of A and Canada, experience living life all by myself in a totally different environment, really touch and walk through snow, and live through winter, take a road trip up the East coast of Canada from Guelph to Quebec city and back again, suffer through a painful semester of harsh NUS academic reality, get proposed to way beyond my wildest most romantic dreams.

No siree, wouldn't trade any of these for the world. Not even the countless screaming matches I had with my parents, cos all of those just made me all the more self-aware and made me realise my own faults more than anything else. I'm bad as well as quick tempered, hugely annoyingly hyperbolic when I'm hopping mad, and I do recognise my propensity for petulance and my-way-or-the-highway sort of behaviour. I'm selfish - try as I may not to be, very messy and careless, and have a huge weakness for buying new clothes, shoes and bags every so often.

You may be wondering why I've chosen to write about my own irrepressible awfulness for my 1st post of the new year - but I'm not sadistic nor am I pessimistic about my upcoming year, given my million and one personal faults. Rather, what I am doing now is acknowledging myself for who I really am, and with that knowledge, try to behave contrary to my natural tendencies in the upcoming year. I'm not saying I'll be a changed person just by wanting to be, but I do want to not be so horrid a person, that I really do.

I want to be less mean-spirited, critical and petty. I want to be more giving, loving, and generous. I do not want to live my life constantly disliking something or someone or the other - it's a painful way to live life. Hate only consumes oneself, it does nothing to the person you hate on. The head knows but the self finds it difficult to stop hating and keep loving.

I want to be more driven in my schoolwork because I know there's so much more I can offer. I was determined not to languish in pathetic second-lower class honours mediocrity, and I still am - though I am tending towards resignation of my undeniable lackadaisical academic standing. This upcoming sem, I will write my Honours Thesis on the function of fantasy in children's literature, and I am absolutely determined not to shortchange myself with my laziness. I will be disciplined in my reading and writing, and I will begin tomorrow.

I also want to clear out all the junk in my room and sell off the clothes in my wardrobe I no longer wear. Even if I only make 10 bucks per piece, I wouldn't mind. My messy room is really killing me, clutter is making me feel suffocated.


Last but not least, I am fricking determined to finally get into shape. 2010 will be the year when I am no longer lethargic, flabby, and fat. I've been running and going to the gym 5 out of the last 7 days, and I feel so much better and more alive at this point. It's more than just vanity that makes me want to exercise, though I have to admit that wanting to keep my figure is a huge motivator. I need my mind to learn discipline and tenacity for my final year in uni - I cannot let myself leave university with nary a fizzle come December 2010.

May 2010 be as beautiful as 2009 has been. :)
I'm a very blessed girl.