another lateeeee night. trying to skim through Lacan's seminar on the purloined letter now so i can contribute in tomorrow's meeting. studied with Tri again today, after coming back from a day in town doing my hair & going to the supreme court.
school work has been a complete bitch lately, & i dunno how i'm gonna do everything i need to do before this week is up. one thing at a time. the essays, then the catching up.
i've been so pmsy lately, & i'm glad you haven't lost your patience with me yet. the smallest thing sets me off, & it must be difficult to be with me when i'm in moods like these. you said as long as you know - & i do.
i feel as though i'm in a bubble world, where it's just that few people who matter & that few things that i occupy myself with. & yet, i don't have the energy to do anything else.
things at home haven't been all that quiet & peaceful. well, sometimes, there's the peace. but then, sometimes, there's the screaming & shouting & disagreeing. i do admit that the thought of leaving home has crossed my mind more than once in the midst of all the exchange of heated words. i think about where i could go, when i could go - then stop cos mad as i am, i never quite find it within me to just up & go. perhaps it's out of fear that my actions would hurt my parents, perhaps it's out of the fear that i wouldn't survive myself & would have to eventually come back with my tail snug between my legs. call me a coward, yeah, but i can't and won't just end my misery by leaving home. even at the age of 21.
i miss you. more than you know.
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