This is not a wedding post per se.
I guess what this is is that I'm trying to remind myself to be less narrow-minded, especially with so much going on around me. It's so easy to slip into the bridezilla persona, thinking that the whole world revolves around me and my big day - and that my intolerance and grumpiness is entirely justified.
Notice how many brides act unreasonably and throw hissy fits when things don't go their way - and even more strangely, how their family and friends accept this sort of behaviour without so much as telling Bridezilla to get a grip? Bridezilla has been normalized by one-too-many Hollywood comedies about the antics of grown, intelligent women.
But this doesn't mean that such behaviour is even all right to begin with, and I've begun to re-examine my own behaviour leading up to my wedding.
And hopefully, halt my transformation into the Bridezilla I've derided ever since I've been introduced to her.
As much as I am excited about my wedding, as much as I may think other people are as excited as I am to see me in my beautiful white gown gliding down the aisle, the fact is that I have placed my own wedding on a pedestal. Friends may be understanding about my one-too-many cancellations or no-shows cos of all the wedding planning lined up in my schedule - but I should not assume that my wedding is of the utmost importance between now and 19 November.
Life does go on, whirring on around me. There are other important events that I need to attend to. Birthdays of friends and family, farewells, weekly family gatherings, even work datelines (much as it pain me to keep track of a dateline when my bosses don't seem to care or even know what a "dateline" mean).
As a bride-to-be, it has struck me at the inherent selfishness the entire wedding preparation process results in. We - or I - assume that friends and family should and will help me in whatever needs to be done. When they are unable to do so for whatever reason, I unconsciously immediately feel hard done by.
Which is why Micah's extortion to "act justly, love tenderly, and walk humbly" is such a tall order for me, especially in this season of my life.
But I shall try, with three months to go.
You're all more than welcome to remind me of my resolution whenever it seems that I'm slipping. ;)
***
And for those of you who are (still) interested after having read what I think about being over-excited about my own wedding, I'll end this entry with some pictures chronicling some of my wedding (or new home) related activities. Even though I may resolve to unbecome bridezilla - I am STILL very much excited :D
Notice how many brides act unreasonably and throw hissy fits when things don't go their way - and even more strangely, how their family and friends accept this sort of behaviour without so much as telling Bridezilla to get a grip? Bridezilla has been normalized by one-too-many Hollywood comedies about the antics of grown, intelligent women.
But this doesn't mean that such behaviour is even all right to begin with, and I've begun to re-examine my own behaviour leading up to my wedding.
And hopefully, halt my transformation into the Bridezilla I've derided ever since I've been introduced to her.
As much as I am excited about my wedding, as much as I may think other people are as excited as I am to see me in my beautiful white gown gliding down the aisle, the fact is that I have placed my own wedding on a pedestal. Friends may be understanding about my one-too-many cancellations or no-shows cos of all the wedding planning lined up in my schedule - but I should not assume that my wedding is of the utmost importance between now and 19 November.
Life does go on, whirring on around me. There are other important events that I need to attend to. Birthdays of friends and family, farewells, weekly family gatherings, even work datelines (much as it pain me to keep track of a dateline when my bosses don't seem to care or even know what a "dateline" mean).
As a bride-to-be, it has struck me at the inherent selfishness the entire wedding preparation process results in. We - or I - assume that friends and family should and will help me in whatever needs to be done. When they are unable to do so for whatever reason, I unconsciously immediately feel hard done by.
"To act justly, love tenderly, and walk humbly with your God"
- is precisely what I'm called to do every day, in every way.
The prophet Micah spoke wisely, but his advice is not easy in the least.
In the face of so much activity, I am more often than not overcome by irritation, cattiness, and generally unbecoming behaviour, brought about by exhaustion from the day-to-day drudgery and the whirlwind of wedding preparation.
I'm not trying to make excuses for myself, but this is what it is:
My day time job has taken over my most of my life, my wedding preparation has taken over what's left of it.
I try to find time every week to meet up with various dear girl friends, which leaves me with almost no time for alone time for personal rest and relaxation, or time with Clem just doing non-wedding-related stuff.
I am not complaining about the way I'm spending my time, please don't get me wrong!
But I do think that some re-prioritizing needs to be done here, without compromising on all the responsibilities and other roles I have - work, wedding planning, friends, family... As I throw myself into all the activity around me, I'm also too aware of the lack of alone time. Which has, ironically, left me ever more alienated from people than ever.
Amid all the time spent with people doing things, I've become increasingly less emphatic to people in general. As I plan for what is arguably the hugest event of my life thus far, I belittle other people in my exhaustion-induced-irritability.
I'm not trying to make excuses for myself, but this is what it is:
My day time job has taken over my most of my life, my wedding preparation has taken over what's left of it.
I try to find time every week to meet up with various dear girl friends, which leaves me with almost no time for alone time for personal rest and relaxation, or time with Clem just doing non-wedding-related stuff.
I am not complaining about the way I'm spending my time, please don't get me wrong!
But I do think that some re-prioritizing needs to be done here, without compromising on all the responsibilities and other roles I have - work, wedding planning, friends, family... As I throw myself into all the activity around me, I'm also too aware of the lack of alone time. Which has, ironically, left me ever more alienated from people than ever.
Amid all the time spent with people doing things, I've become increasingly less emphatic to people in general. As I plan for what is arguably the hugest event of my life thus far, I belittle other people in my exhaustion-induced-irritability.
Which is why Micah's extortion to "act justly, love tenderly, and walk humbly" is such a tall order for me, especially in this season of my life.
But I shall try, with three months to go.
You're all more than welcome to remind me of my resolution whenever it seems that I'm slipping. ;)
***
And for those of you who are (still) interested after having read what I think about being over-excited about my own wedding, I'll end this entry with some pictures chronicling some of my wedding (or new home) related activities. Even though I may resolve to unbecome bridezilla - I am STILL very much excited :D
On one of the weekends, Clem and I went to get stuff for his room - you know, the one that's gonna be OURS in a short 3 months 4 days. It's funny cos our priorities might seem a lil messed up - one of the first items we got was not a wardrobe, not a bed, not even a book shelf... But a TV.
Shows you our priorities, huh. Hurhur.
So anyway, new TV aside (which we haven't gotten round to installing yet - we'll only be able to do so after the room's been painted and the new chest of drawers that we got as a table for the TV arrives)...
You can also see my new Kate Spade bag! :P
No, I do not have aspirations to marry a Private Secretary to a minister.
I'd gotten it through the 99% Reebonz sale that took place about a month ago, where all items in the sale were going for 1% of their original price. It was an extremely good bargain, and the buy was all the sweeter because it was quite difficult to gain access into the private sale! I had to be among the first 100 to obtain a code.. And obviously, I was!
So YES. Best deal of the year, and I will definitely try to participate again next year!
WIW:
Tulip sleeved top in mustard from Hollyhoque
Bohemian Eyelet Skirt in navy from Her Velvet Vase
Woven straw bag with neon yellow accents from Kate Spade via Reebonz
Sandals in nude from Tangs Studio
So the next day, we went shopping for our flower girl dresses + went to pick up our wedding bands.
Such a productive weekend, that was!
I'd noticed that the dresses in this really delightful kids' wear shop were displayed in my wedding theme of pink, pistachio and cream!
That caught my attention for sure ;)
Clem and I decided to get our flower girls to don pistachio dresses instead of the usual sweet pink colour palette a lot of flower girls are decked out in! For a tad more zest, spunk and attitude ;)
We're gonna remove the ribbon pin on the shoulder strap though.. It looks a little too big and stiff for my liking.
Dinner that night was at Ajisen for a steaming bowl of ramen.
Don't really like their ramen there though.. It's not really value for money, nor does it taste exceptional or anything. Doubt I will be heading back there again anytime soon!
We'd only stepped in out of convenience and desire to avoid the long queues elsewhere.
Quick WIW:
Pleated bandeau top in gunmetal from Catwalkclose
Floral print skirt from H&M
Sweet pink faux leather bag from Vincci
Studded leather sandals in black from Aldo
And of course... The highlight of that weekend:
Simple and classic with that right touch of sparkle.
Just how I envision my wedding day to be. :)
2 comments:
Eh...
It's "DEADline" my dear, not dateline.
It means "miss it and you're DEAD" - that's why "DEADline".
I love you!
Ahhhh haha okay. But as I said, a "dateline" does exist!!
Post a Comment